A  policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem--a 12-year-old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign, which read 'RADAR TRAP AHEAD.' The officer also found the boy had an accomplice who was down the road with a sign reading 'TIPS' and a bucket full of money. (And we used to just sell lemonade!)

 A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar post. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs.

A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book. She said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Trooper's Ball." He replied, "State Troopers don't have balls." There was a moment of silence. He then closed his book, tipped his hat, got back in his patrol car and left.

Q: What do eskimos get from sitting on icebergs?  

A: Polaroids


Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?

A: They take the psychopath

An older gentleman, 89 years of age, was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night .

He replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."

The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The gentleman replied, "That would be my wife."

Haha!  That took me a second!

I heard Vanna years ago in an interview say that the answer was "Gone with the Wind". The contestant guessed "Done with one Hand".  

pg wrote on 02/13/15 at 17:16:22:




What's the name of the thread?


Unfortunate moments in the history of Wheel of Fortune?

That's just Awful! And funny,,

runwyrlph wrote on 02/14/15 at 07:05:06:

"We feed the squirrels popsicles"... ...

runwyrlph wrote on 02/14/15 at 07:05:06:


Feeding it mentally challenged persons (you just volunteered)  

The Pope was having a shower. Although he was very strict about celibacy, he occasionally felt he
needed to exercise the Papal wrist, and this happened to be one of those occasions.

Just as he reached the Papal climax, he saw a photographer taking a picture of the holy semen
flying through the air.
“Hold on a minute!” said the Pope, ”You can’t do that-you’ll destroy the reputation of the church!”
“This is my lottery win,” said the photographer. ” I’ll be financially secure for life with these photo’s!”

So the Pope offered to buy the camera from the photographer and after much negotiation, they eventually settled on a figure of $2 million.
The Pope clothed himself and headed off to destroy the images on the camera.

Along the vast Vatican hallways, he bumped into his personal housekeeper.
Being a bit of a photography buff, she noticed the camera and said,
“That looks like a really expensive digital SLR camera, how much did it cost you?”
Not being one to lie, the Pope replied, “$2 million.”

“Two Million Dollars!” replied the housekeeper.
“They must of seen you coming!”