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HUMOR (jokes and such!) (Read 13690 times)
gizzo
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #675 - 11/10/15 at 03:51:23
 
A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, “It’s not a ship”. The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, “It’s not a boat”. The speck gets even closer and he thinks, “It’s not a raft”.

Then, out of the surf comes this gorgeous blonde woman, wearing a wet suit and scuba gear. She comes up to the guy and she says, “How long has it been since you’ve had a cigarette?” “Ten years!” he says. She reaches over, unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pack of fresh cigarettes. He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag and says, “Man, oh man! Is that good!”

Then she asks, “How long has it been since you’ve had a drink of whiskey?” He replies, “Ten years!” She reaches over, unzips her waterproof pocket on the right, pulls out a flask and gives it to him. He takes a long swig and says, “Wow, that’s fantastic!”

Then she starts unzipping this long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit and she says to him, “And how long has it been since you’ve had some REAL fun?” And the man replies, “My God! Don’t tell me you’ve got a motorcycle in there!”
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #676 - 11/10/15 at 10:50:02
 
I'm still laughing on that one. That was good.
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Dave
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #677 - 11/10/15 at 13:33:46
 
springman wrote on 11/10/15 at 10:50:02:
I'm still laughing on that one. That was good.


What's so funny.....the man ask the lady a very serious question! Huh
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Kris01
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #678 - 11/10/15 at 19:42:09
 
Don't you hate those guys that knock on your door and tell you that you have to be saved or you'll burn?





Stupid fireman!
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Kris01
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #679 - 11/10/15 at 19:54:05
 
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There's no problem that a full tank of gas and a sunny day can't fix!

2008 S40, Rotella T 15W-40 w/ZDDP added, Dyna, 140/90-15, Battery Tender Jr., Seat lift, #52.5/150/3 washers, Raptor
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springman
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #680 - 11/10/15 at 21:34:30
 
Dave, there are some things.... well, there are a few things...., well there is at least one thing I enjoy more than riding a motorcycle.
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Kenny G
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #681 - 11/10/15 at 23:00:36
 
SpringMan,

You must be whole lot younger than the rest of us....LOL

Kenny G
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Art Webb
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #682 - 11/11/15 at 10:43:15
 
I think I'm with springman on that one
of course, I'm only 49
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Kris01
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #683 - 11/11/15 at 18:16:18
 
springman wrote on 11/10/15 at 21:34:30:
Dave, there are some things.... well, there are a few things...., well there is at least one thing I enjoy more than riding a motorcycle.


Wait...I don't get it!

Grin Grin Grin
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There's no problem that a full tank of gas and a sunny day can't fix!

2008 S40, Rotella T 15W-40 w/ZDDP added, Dyna, 140/90-15, Battery Tender Jr., Seat lift, #52.5/150/3 washers, Raptor
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #684 - 11/11/15 at 18:47:19
 
I enjoy driving antique cars marginally better than riding a motorcycle, and if necessary you can lock a motorcycle or an antique car in the shed for some time. Their complaints are nominal.
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springman
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #685 - 11/11/15 at 20:11:25
 
Kenny, Kris, I don't know how to respond.

JC you have a good point!!!
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06 S40 seat mod, airhawk, HD muffler, Shinko 712 140-90-15 rear tire, Shinko 230 front tire, versy cam chain tensioner, Rotella oil, Volar brake pads, EBC clutch & springs
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old_rider
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #686 - 11/11/15 at 21:29:56
 
Kris01 wrote on 11/11/15 at 18:16:18:
springman wrote on 11/10/15 at 21:34:30:
Dave, there are some things.... well, there are a few things...., well there is at least one thing I enjoy more than riding a motorcycle.


Wait...I don't get it!

Grin Grin Grin


Well, when I see a picture of a bike behind some ones backside (usually a girl), I usually want to see the bike.... as I know I could have the bike, but, I already have a backside I can look at, and not get smacked for looking at another one  Wink  Shocked  Smiley  Roll Eyes
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We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.
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jcstokes
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #687 - 11/11/15 at 22:05:44
 
Certain other allegedly pleasurable activities were described by the English lexicographer Dr Johnson, and the New Zealand human??? J C Stokes as follows. The pleasure momentary, the positions ridiculous and the expense darnable.
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Art Webb
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #688 - 11/12/15 at 21:10:05
 
I find the vertical to be the most ridiculous position
either leaned, or horizontal, are better  Grin
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justin_o_guy2
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Re: HUMOR (jokes and such!)
Reply #689 - 11/12/15 at 21:24:30
 
I guess I hafta stand with ya on that.
Wait,
Does that look wrong?
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The people never give up their liberties but under some delusion.- Edmund Burke.
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