Art Webb wrote on 11/06/16 at 08:31:41:I would say to her
Do you want me to 'live' a life of denial, while I die a little each time I see another bike? Or actually live, untill I don't, anymore? (of course you may not feel that strongly about bikes)
I knew a guy who quit riding at his wife's behest, and lived a miserable life
Until a collision with a cable dump took his life, 4 months or so down the road, while commuting home on the freeway
On his bike, he never took the freeway
It was mean, it was horrible, it was nasty, but I couldn't help myself, as I said "good thing he was in that nice safe car on the freeway, instead of on that 'dangerous' bike on an empty back road"
Everyone here knows how i feel about this by now, you marry a person, it shouldn't make you their slave (IMO you shouldn't marry, period) It's SUPPOSED to be a partner ship of Mutual Benefit
I'm not riding much right now, but that's my choice, not someone else's
Your contribution to her life is every bit as beneficial as hers to yours, at least for the past 14 years, possibly more so, if you are the 'provider' in the relationship, but you somehow 'owe her' the surrender of something you love 'because wife'
Your call, brother, and no judgement, regardless how prickly my diatribe may sound, it's your choice, not mine, but I just can't see letting someone else control me
Thanks Art....
I know how hard it is to dialogue in this domain, we lack visual and audio input, which can be as important as the words spoken, in defining the meaning and intent, of any given subject.
I understand your gist, and appreciate it buddy!
We are all unique, and that it what is so wonderful about accepting life, on its terms.
We can try and bend it to our liking, our comfort zone, or to justify us, but that so steals away that which makes each one as different as our thumb print.
I am like a pioneer, who ventured west to the gold fields, looking for placer deposits....
I gather supplies, game plan, but I will need to wade into the water of a chilling creek, to dip my pan.
My body may shiver, my back ache, my hands turn blue, but its a price I must pay in order to succeed.
I work the pan, till all that is left, is the remnants of what I started with. Its up to me to decide that which has value, and that that doesn't, before I plunge it back in again.... or move on.
You guys, by your sharing, have loaded my pan with all sorts of keepers, its up to me now to discern.......
Thank you