I got t-boned by a 4x4 truck 3 years ago...
That hurt an unimaginable amount...
Not my first crash...  
I've been in 2 bicycle crashes with cars, and 2 solo street bike crashes,... along with numerous dirt riding crashes, and this one...

I was flinchy,.. even in my car, for 6 months to a year after...
Several occasions... I became literally paralyzed, while trying to back up out of a parking place, at the supermarket... in my car...
A hard hit... makes you realize how very vulnerable you are at any moment...
For about a year... my eyes flinched, every time I turned left... in a car or on a bike... even as a passenger... (I would see a kind of strobe light flashing)...
I never stopped riding... but I had to force myself to continue...

Eventually, the memory and the fear fades...(the illusion of personal immortality returns)...
..but, the reality that you can buy it, at any time, becomes very slightly clearer...
You can buy it in the shower, or on the toilet... or mowing the lawn, or fixing the roof...
..and eventually you will...
Life is a one way ride... you will die...
I'm not at all comfortable with that... but, I get closer every time I get a taste...
Life is so short, no matter how careful you are...
I feel so blessed to have gotten this far, when so many don't...
But I'm not yet comfortable with the big sleep...
I'm also not comfortable with with living in a germ free, rubber room, eating only oatmeal...

It's all about balance...  ...

I started giving to St.Judes... hoping for some karmic balance...
So many children suffering more than I can imagine...
I have a good ways to go, before I reach balance...

I say... don't think a motorcycle will be the death of you...
Death will choose it's own way...
You choose how you live... if you feel you need to quit riding, there's no shame in that either...
I will never jump out of a plane... (just don't sound fun to me)... ...
...

I try to think that I've come to terms with death.  While I obviously don't WANT to die (especially at the spry age of 25) I know that it happens when it happens and I probably can't stop it.  I don't really believe in fate, but death is kind of a given.

The truth of it is death isn't really what gives me the shakes in this case; it's my lack of practice and experience lately that bothers me.  My only ride ended poorly, and I don't want to repeat the experience.  Whether it were another small slide where I had to replace a handful of parts or if some Town Car turned to run me over (I've previously swerved from more than a handful of those...) I don't want to have to rip my bike apart again or go through the embarrassment.

A year ago, I could have swerved and weaved in the road and thought nothing of it. Today, I fear dropping my bike at every turn.  That's the confidence I want back: the faith in my own abilities.

yup, even if you've taken it, a repeat on the course is 2 days in the saddle that'll build your confidence up.

and then there's a second level course.

I have been in a fatal accident, its always there......my wife was damaged beyond belief, she still can't set in the same seat.... but you move on.

Learn from the past, but don't live in it, as you can't, and you have taken your focus off the present.

Only been riding about 4 years now, daily. From bright sunshine, heavy rain to snow, and the greatest obstacle I have is my own fear. Riding a bike requires a calmness that puts us on the top of our reflexives, which I have come to find makes me a way better rider.  

My experience was quite a serious accident about thirty five years ago, when a car lost control on a bend and rotated across the road into me. I was a month in hospital and have quite a good scar in my right foot to show for it. Friends rebuilt my Jawa 350 and I began to ride about two months later. the rebuild wasn't successful as there had been damage to the steering head. When I put the front brake on there were nasty vibrations. This made me nervous. just under a year later I was overtaking a woman, when a dog ran in front of here. She braked hard and the brand new rear brakes on her car locked up with the cars rear clipping me and flinging me down the road. I wasn't badly hurt, but it put me off bikes for twenty plus years. About seven years ago I came back to motorcycling and was very glad I took a refresher course. So far no serious accidents in about thirty five thousand miles. I did manage to fall off the bike while it was stationary, and sustained a cut.
When you have done your refresher course, try and go to some quiet rural road where you can get back into riding without too much traffic hassle. Hopefully this will give open road speed and manouverablity confidence again. Then gradually work into suburban traffic, preferably at quiet times to start. If you can rise early on a Sunday morning, ie daybreak, you should have time to get out before most people are up. Don't deny yourself breakfast. Good luck with your reintegration to riding.

I think that the real answer to your questions depends on whether you are someone who rides a bike, or are a biker, who has no choice but to ride.  If the latter, it may take you a very long time to get over an accident.  If you are a rider, then you will get back on the bike as soon as you are physically able to, and  just ride.

I got rear ended a couple years on my ninja and took off a couple years but now that I have my savage I cant believe I gave it up. I was nervous as hell when I got my new bike but I kind of liked the nervousness in a weird way.