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Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke... (Read 293 times)
Serowbot
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Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
05/17/12 at 22:24:17
 
.. sin of sins, as it is today... ...and, if you've never smoked,.. you won't get this...

... but,..
... it was the last one in the pack,..
I couldn't sleep,.. it was dark...so, I pulled it out, and threw it on the bed,... crumpled the empty pack, and tossed it aside...
I reached for the last gem I had, laying upon the bed, and stuck it to my lips... and flicked the lighter,.. spark, spark, spark,... twenty or thirty times... but no light...
Uhh...
So, I get up and go to the lighter fluid on the bookcase, pop the bottom off the lighter, cigg still dangling from my lips... but, it's too dark to see...
In,... to the bathroom,.. where the closest light is... and in front of the sink,... I fill the lighter with fluid, and replace the cover...
... as I flick the lighter,.. I look up into the vanity mirror, and see myself,... as the lighter approaches the white filter end of the cigarette between my lips...
... and I thank the angel that made me get up, and put me though all this nuisance, in the middle of the night... to spare me, that rank taste of sucking burnt filter into my lungs...

Smoking is bad enough... bless my angel for sparing me this horrid, indignity.....
What would I do without you, my angel?... Huh.. .

Somewhere, in some way... there exists a very busy being,... that has saved my life, more than once... and even watches for such ludicrous  behaviour as, lighting the wrong end of my smoke, in the middle of the night... 

I'm just glad I noticed my reflection in the mirror... or the next step might have been to make the ceiling fan crash unto my head...
These angel folk,... are a stubborn people...
They will make themselves heard...
One way, or,.. another...
Wink...
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Ludicrous Speed !... ... Huh...
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babyhog
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #1 - 05/18/12 at 07:39:41
 
Funny story, and yep, almost as bad as burnt hair!   Grin  And the last one in the pack?  That woulda been even more tragic!  

Oh, and I appreciate YOUR angel very much.  Wink
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #2 - 05/18/12 at 11:56:27
 
Yup.  It's been a long time but I remember that taste.  Good angel you got there.
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mpescatori
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #3 - 05/20/12 at 11:03:11
 
Next time you feel like a smoke, go to a proper shop, speak to the man, and buy yourself a pipe smoker's starter pack.

So much more dignity, time to think, techniques to master and flair.

AND

Unlike cigarettes, which are full of "self-combusting" additives so that the cig never goes out, the pipe demands your attention, like a true lady  Wink

Anyone can look like a hoodlum with a bogey dangling from his lips.

But light a pipe, and you're Sir Serow from Castle Bot  Cool

(do I hear bagpipes in the wind and rolling thunder in the bay?)
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Serowbot
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #4 - 05/20/12 at 11:48:19
 
Mmm?... Sir Serow... I like that...
Do I need a monocle and satin jacket?... Huh...
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mpescatori
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #5 - 05/20/12 at 13:15:17
 
Serowbot wrote on 05/20/12 at 11:48:19:
Mmm?... Sir Serow... I like that...
Do I need a monocle and satin jacket?... Huh...


Nay, Sire, but thou would'st require a pwopah ax'ent and a somewhat aloof disposition whilst discussing hawses and cawses with thine neighbours...

Wink

Tea, Sir Serow? From Long Island, may I suggest ?
Quite a refreshing afternoon drink, Sir, it's from the Colonies,  Cheesy
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Maurizio Pescatori, Esq.
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Mikuni BST40, K&N filter, Stage2 cam, Verslagen tensioner, Sportster muff, 120 proof moonshine, Pirelli MT 66 tourers... and a chain conversion too !
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #6 - 05/20/12 at 19:44:32
 
Serowbot wrote on 05/20/12 at 11:48:19:
Mmm?... Sir Serow... I like that...
Do I need a monocle and satin jacket?... Huh...


Seated on a button-tucked, High Winged-Back chair, surrounded by many leather bound books, with the distict aroma of mahogany wafting through the softly lit study... Cool
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #7 - 05/20/12 at 23:14:24
 
SuperSavage wrote on 05/20/12 at 19:44:32:
Seated on a button-tucked, High Winged-Back chair, surrounded by many leather bound books, with the distict aroma of mahogany wafting through the softly lit study... Cool

Yeah,... I gotta' buy all that stuff,too... Huh...
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mpescatori
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #8 - 05/21/12 at 01:23:43
 
And don't forget the hounds !

Two Afghan hounds for the fireplace, two mastiffs to the Butler for the front door, and a pack of yapping beagles for the fox hunt !

(You want cuddly beagles for the foxhunt, else the girls get scared away...)



Cheesy
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Maurizio Pescatori, Esq.
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Mikuni BST40, K&N filter, Stage2 cam, Verslagen tensioner, Sportster muff, 120 proof moonshine, Pirelli MT 66 tourers... and a chain conversion too !
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justin_o_guy2
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #9 - 05/21/12 at 04:27:40
 
I stopped liking commercially available cigs years ago. They have, over the years, gone the way of Fast Food. No longer palatable,& full of chemicals. So, I tried a pipe,, Waay too frustrating, hard to work & smoke a pipe, hard on teeth & jaw, spit gets in the stem,, so, I buy imported pipe tobacco & roll my own, I spend about $15.00 every 2 weeks on papers & baccy, I have a nifty little rolling method, a dollar bill mounted on a block with a dowel rod attached on the loose end to spin it up with, I have it all set up on an old Sonic window tray from the 80's. All American tobacco has Thimerosol sprayed on it, thats mercury for them who dont know, & every cig manufacturer has its own concoction of chemicals they add, like gasoline companies,
Just give me a pinch of tobacco & a rolling paper,,

I did manage to learn how to smoke a bowl when I was playing with the CB radio a lot, it takes practice to feel how to pack a bowl. Ive heard of pipe smoking competitions, where people take their pipe & pipe tool, everybody loads out of the same bunch of tobacco & everyone gets ONE match,, the last one still smoking wins,.
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The people never give up their liberties but under some delusion.- Edmund Burke.
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mpescatori
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #10 - 05/21/12 at 06:58:09
 
Yep ! That's the spirit !  Cool

The pipe is like a woman, she wants to be treated with respect and due care, diligence and... a little TLC.

And if you treat her right she'll keep you warm  Wink

Else, she'll go out cold on you  Roll Eyes

I stopped smoking my pipe when my dentist "tsktsktsk"-ed me and ... devitalized two molars...
Not quite the fault of my smoking, but related, as my gums had pulled back much farther than I thought after plastic surgery to my throat.
So the soot slowly made its way in over time and I eventually had to teeth going into decay from the inside...

I occasionally toy with a cigar nowadays, little tightly packed thingies called "Toscano", the traditional Italian cigar made in Lucca, the city of Puccini.

TOSCANO CIGARS ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... GIACOMO PUCCINI


Link to the Manifacture of Toscano Cigars
http://www.manifatturesigarotoscano.it/en/home/1.html

Link to the City of Lucca
http://www.comune.lucca.it/flex/cm/pages/ServeBLOB.php/L/EN/IDPagina/4635
It's worth a visit  Smiley
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Maurizio Pescatori, Esq.
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Mikuni BST40, K&N filter, Stage2 cam, Verslagen tensioner, Sportster muff, 120 proof moonshine, Pirelli MT 66 tourers... and a chain conversion too !
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #11 - 05/21/12 at 08:02:17
 
I have smoked pipes for many years, and collect and smoke Meerschaums, mainly. I have 34 pipes, 11 of which are meerschaums.
Mpescatori, you are absolutely correct. Each pipe has a different personality, just like women. Some are cool and laid back, some are hot and edgy, some are easy to live with, some are more difficult. Each has to be handled differently.
I like the rituals of packing and lighting, and being able to choose a pipe that suites my mood.
I have two Calabash's. They are heaven to smoke.
I smoke a hand blended tobacco called Black Cavendish, which has vanilla in it and smells like cake.
If anyone were to start smoking a pipe I recommend you buy three inexpensive wood pipes, as you can only smoke a wood pipe for a day and it has to rest for two days, to dry out, so the moisture doesn't burn your tongue, called "biting". Meerschaum does not do this. Also start with the mildest tobacco you can find. I know several people who got fed up with cigarettes, bought a single pipe and were disillusioned with it because it "went sour" after a day.
Gee, until I wrote this post I never realized how sensual pipe smoking is. Roll Eyes

You can always tell a pipe smoker by his dirty thumb, and the holes in his tie.

And it is REALLY hard to light the wrong end. Grin
My youngest son went to Cuba recently and brought back a Cohiba VI for me, considered to be one of the best cigars in the world. He paid US$18 for it. They cost $70 each here and have to be special ordered.
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arteacher
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #12 - 05/21/12 at 08:31:01
 
justin_o_guy2 wrote on 05/21/12 at 04:27:40:
I stopped liking commercially available cigs years ago. They have, over the years, gone the way of Fast Food. No longer palatable,& full of chemicals. So, I tried a pipe,, Waay too frustrating, hard to work & smoke a pipe, hard on teeth & jaw, spit gets in the stem,, so, I buy imported pipe tobacco & roll my own, I spend about $15.00 every 2 weeks on papers & baccy, I have a nifty little rolling method, a dollar bill mounted on a block with a dowel rod attached on the loose end to spin it up with, I have it all set up on an old Sonic window tray from the 80's. All American tobacco has Thimerosol sprayed on it, thats mercury for them who dont know, & every cig manufacturer has its own concoction of chemicals they add, like gasoline companies,
Just give me a pinch of tobacco & a rolling paper,,

I did manage to learn how to smoke a bowl when I was playing with the CB radio a lot, it takes practice to feel how to pack a bowl. Ive heard of pipe smoking competitions, where people take their pipe & pipe tool, everybody loads out of the same bunch of tobacco & everyone gets ONE match,, the last one still smoking wins,.

Back in my college days I went out with a hippie chick who used to hitch hike a lot. She would put loose tobacco and papers in her pocket, stick her hand in and role a decent smoke with one hand, in her pocket.
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white '07, Raask exh, Corbin seat, slipstreamer shie, Raptor, Routy's fwd controls, Baron tach, Frisco bars, Isogrips, Headlight and taillight modulators, Dial-a- jet, AME 9 deg chop kit, K&N air flt
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justin_o_guy2
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What happened?

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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #13 - 05/21/12 at 12:08:28
 
Thats amazing,, on my best day it takes 2 hands.. out in front of me,
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The people never give up their liberties but under some delusion.- Edmund Burke.
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Serowbot
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OK.... so what's the
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Re: Last night,.. I tried to light a smoke...
Reply #14 - 05/21/12 at 12:13:14
 
... and she could tie a knot in a cherry stem, with her tongue... Huh...
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Ludicrous Speed !... ... Huh...
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