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Message started by verslagen1 on 06/20/24 at 14:21:20

Title: A friend told me...
Post by verslagen1 on 06/20/24 at 14:21:20

I can not shop at Costco anymore :-)))))Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an elephant?So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me,
I thought the man behind her was on the verge of a heart attack from laughing so intensely.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!
Credit_Hollywood highlight

Title: Re: A friend told me...
Post by ThumperPaul on 06/20/24 at 14:27:09

;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: A friend told me...
Post by MMRanch on 06/20/24 at 19:15:10

;D ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: A friend told me...
Post by Ruttly on 06/22/24 at 09:59:23

On my first meeting with my RICP , he had asked me a series of questions. He asked me if I had any fears on retirement. I replied cat food , his head fell to the side , he mouth fell open & nothing came out. Real hard to keep a serious demeanor in the silence. I broke the silence with , I’m ok with Gravy Train but I just can’t do cat food. As he took a breath and began to speak , I slipped up and smiled. He admitted that in fifteen years nobody ever said anything like that and was trying hard to find a resolution to my problem in his head. Excellent Customer Service !

Title: Re: A friend told me...
Post by Serowbot on 06/22/24 at 15:12:44

OMG! ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: A friend told me...
Post by springman on 07/03/24 at 14:49:31

;D ;D ;D