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Message started by Face on 08/22/13 at 19:39:56

Title: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Face on 08/22/13 at 19:39:56

Well, after many happy years with a wonderful woman turned b****, I find myself back in the dating game. WooHoo >:(

For starters, I don't even know HOW to date anymore, and to compound my frustrations, I've been swamped with family and friends playing "Matchmaker"....... Not fun.

Anywho, a few people are trying to convince me to try online dating.........I don't think I can do it. Have ya ever been window shoppin' on eHarmony? All I can say is "Wow.....really?"

Just curious to see if any of you fine fellows have had any experience with it (good or bad) and what your thoughts might be.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by SALB on 08/22/13 at 20:33:25

You might check out Meetup. I know there are several "singles" groups in the Boise area, and would imagine the same is true in Salt Lake.

http://www.meetup.com/

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by old_rider on 08/22/13 at 20:53:40

Face, just go out and do stuff you like to do, that way, if you meet a gal out there doing the stuff you like to do, then more than likely you two will get along right nicely.

Just remember, if you treat someone like you want to be treated, you will always be happy with that person if they return the favor, if they don't treat you the same way, go meet someone that will.

All in all, there are going to be a few folks who lie, cheat, and steal, to get what they can.... you just gotta learn to tune your radar to pick up those types...sometimes it takes a few times...

Good luck ! Don't go out looking, let them find you.... :)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by verslagen1 on 08/22/13 at 21:05:08

not too many girls come to my wrenching parties. :'(

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Midnightrider on 08/22/13 at 21:33:20

I tried online dating and Serowbot's name and picture came up.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Serowbot on 08/22/13 at 22:44:16

Jeepers!... :-?...

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by stinger on 08/23/13 at 02:20:07

Some advice! You can meet some fine people online to date. Many of them do not want to hang in bars and clubs to meet a mate. Some are beautiful and smart and feel more comfortable meeting someone online where they are under no pressure to be someone they are not. Be honest with them and you might be surprised what you find.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by babyhog on 08/23/13 at 05:10:56

I did it for a bit between marraiges, met some really nice men... met some real a-holes. There are some real people out there doing it, and plenty of fakes too. My mother (at 74 years old) met a man online and moved across the country to be with him. It worked for her. My advice is to decide what you want from it. Flings, hang-out buddies, long-term, short-term, playmates, or soulmates? But don't get too wrapped up in it! It will consume your time, stuck in front of the computer, if you let it.

My 2 dating mottos..... 1) If I'm not the one for him, then he's not the one for me. 2) There's a lid for every jar.

Good luck!

Hey Vers... I'd come to your wrenching parties if I could.... But you already know I'm a unique woman! ;)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/23/13 at 07:19:31

766572736C6167656E31000 wrote:

not too many girls come to my wrenching parties. :'(

Dude, you know how a woman likes to feel special ... perhaps instead of inviting a woman to a gathering of a bunch of guys you need to offer more specialized (or personal) training sessions ? ? :)
Intimate, one on one time is what touches a woman's heart. ;)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Dave on 08/23/13 at 07:26:20

When I tell people about going on the trips to ride the Dragon....I tell them that I met you guys on an "Internet Dating Site".....that causes them to wonder for a minute...till I explain a bit further about SuzukiSavage.com.

I spend a lot of time at the gym, and doing volunteer work. I have made a lot of nice elegible women that are great friends......my marital status prevents it from becoming anything else. You might try some of those public forums........and I am finding that there are several women in this area that ride motorcycles or scooters!

Heck....you might even try the personal adds on Craigslist. I imagine there are women in the same situation you are.....and don't know where to look for a guy.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/23/13 at 07:35:01

464D5F43425F5F2C0 wrote:

When my first wife passed away I did not think I would ever remarry. Everyone I knew, or they knew, was part of my former married life and I just did not have that kind of interest in them. They were all very comforting and caring following my wife's death and they felt more like family than someone to date.
I did go to several websites just to see who was there and what they were like. There were some very "interesting" characters to be sure. All sorts of shapes, sizes, colors, etc, and I'm not just speaking of physical characteristics either. Most seemed to be there just for the fun of anonymous flirting. A few were actually looking for real relationships. I happened to find one of those. Months of messages, emails, phone calls, some visits here and there, and a year later we were married. (Jan '12)
I am a blessed man today.
I have a wonderful wife.
For me, it was an interesting and ultimately very positive experience.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Badass94Cad on 08/23/13 at 09:11:11

My buddy met his wife on eHarmony.

I hear Match.com is decent too. But some of the other "free" sites are more people looking to hook up. Not that that's a bad thing. Just set your expectations accordingly. ;)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Wolfman on 08/23/13 at 12:47:43

Last couple of years the #1 pick up site has been listed as your produce section at your local grocery store and wal-mart.
Just hang out around the bananas giggling "their ALL so Small" and see what turns up! ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Badass94Cad on 08/23/13 at 13:06:24

I wouldn't consider WalMart a good pickup spot, unless you have rock-bottom standards. Look at People of WalMart for some examples. ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Wolfman on 08/23/13 at 14:37:23

'I' Shop Wal-Mart.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by stinger on 08/23/13 at 15:46:14

Buying your date at Wal-Mart is actually a very smart thing to do. Much like couches and chairs when your date begins to get soft and wrinkly, you can take her back for a refund instead of just throwing her out on the side of the road. ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Face on 08/23/13 at 16:26:15

3235282F262433410 wrote:

Buying your date at Wal-Mart is actually a very smart thing to do.

Do ya think they ever have a BOGO sale on that? ;)

Also, isn't everything there made in China? I've never dated an asian girl. I'm intrigued!

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Trippah on 08/23/13 at 16:28:24

Verslagen - perhaps they think you are suggesting a wenching party, which IS Great Fun, at least for us dirty olde men. ;)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/23/13 at 17:12:52

2300050012125855220005610 wrote:

I wouldn't consider WalMart a good pickup spot, unless you have rock-bottom standards. Look at People of WalMart for some examples. ;D ;D ;D

You are not looking with the right eyes.
Look a little deeper next time.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/23/13 at 17:15:55

45637861617079110 wrote:

Verslagen - perhaps they think you are suggesting a wenching party, which IS Great Fun, at least for us dirty olde men. ;)

I like WENCHES, especially when they are dressed appropriately !! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by WD on 08/23/13 at 20:53:02

6241444153531914634144200 wrote:

I wouldn't consider WalMart a good pickup spot, unless you have rock-bottom standards. Look at People of WalMart for some examples. ;D ;D ;D

You need to go to a few more Walmarts... most of the "eye candy" in the Southern or PNW stores I frequented give Victoria's Secret models a serious run for their money. Seriously, there are a few absolutely stunning late teens and early 20s that will surprise you.

But, yeah, awful lot of crackheads, tweakers and other assorted undesirables as well.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Badass94Cad on 08/24/13 at 07:34:32

It was a joke, since we are talking about online dating...isn't anybody familiar with that website? :P

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/24/13 at 09:30:31

4162676270703A37406267030 wrote:

It was a joke, since we are talking about online dating...isn't anybody familiar with that website? :P

Which website ?
What did I miss ?

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Toroso on 08/24/13 at 09:41:43

01393A303B3738560 wrote:

Bwa ha ha! ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by babyhog on 08/24/13 at 13:58:14

5774717466662C21567471150 wrote:

It was a joke, since we are talking about online dating...isn't anybody familiar with that website? :P

That site is so hilarious!! I can't look at it at work though, I get myself in trouble laughing so hard. ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by jcstokes on 08/24/13 at 14:44:03

Aren't Walmartians paid actors getting Walmart free advertising on Utube?

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Toroso on 08/24/13 at 14:47:32

636A7A7D66626C7A090 wrote:

Aren't Walmartians paid actors getting Walmart free advertising on Utube?

Unfortunately,,,, no. :o

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Skid Mark on 08/24/13 at 20:09:37

Just do what you like to do and be your self. When you least expect it "Bam" you'll meet someone. Nothing wrong with online dating but sooner our later you have to meet them in person. It is just supposed to eliminate some of the trial& error in the process.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/25/13 at 02:44:19

Face ... I too was married to a wonderful woman for 23 of the 25 years we were together ... then out of the blue, back in 2010, she tells me it's over ... 4 months later I find out she had been having an affair with an old childhood friend she had become reaquainted with on F.B. ... we've been divorced since 2011 and I personally have found being single at my age (currently early 50's) to be difficult. Met a gal last year with whom I had a 3 month relationship ... beautiful, smart and a motorcyclist ... she literally threw herself at me, claimed I was good for her soul, the most decent man she had ever met, etc. etc., only to run off with a Biker who hit on her one day while she was stopped at a red light ... prolly just as well ... buddy is a wealthy contractor who has way more to offer her than me ... no way I could compete with that ...
Have tried online dating, but have not had much success with it ... a handful of coffee dates ... seems most gals who find themselves single in their 40's are looking to "trade up" and though I'm a reasonably attractive guy, with a good career and no issues with anger, drugs, or booze, I am pretty laid back and unasuming ... I don't live a flashy, materialistic lifestyle ... seems like that ain't enough now-a-days though ...

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by justin_o_guy2 on 08/25/13 at 03:05:31

I Think the advice above saying

Go DO the stuff you do,, was good

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/25/13 at 05:05:23

4D786F6F64797C4E7C6B7C7A781D0 wrote:

Forget about the "trading up" type, be patient and wait for those looking for a real relationship based on the heart, not the bank account. If you have a good heart then that will attract someone else with the same.
If you really do want another relationship, a GOOD one, then pray about it. Prayer changes things.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Face on 08/25/13 at 13:27:19

Prayer changes things. Those words are so true in my situation. Not my prayers.....The ex's. I am about as non-religious as they come, but the ex....she was Mormon. Never really devoutly so until the last couple of years. She prayed about a lot of things when her work/family/health began to have issues. Apparently the "Lord" told her she needed to go back to church and get sealed in the temple. (that's a temple marriage for those that don't know) That was obviously not gonna happen with me, and the rest is history.

So at least for now, I'm a little soured on the prayer thing.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/25/13 at 19:18:40

404B59454459592A0 wrote:

I can understand you feeling the way you do. You were trashed in the name of a religion. Not a good thing dude. My heart goes out to you.

GOD does not "cotton" much to divorce; down right hates it in fact, especially when preceded by fornication. Then throw in an unauthorized marriage for a 3rd sin and trying to make it all "right" by having it SEALED in the Temple (which has nothing to do with Gods laws or teaching, strictly a mans created idea; Joseph Smith). Me thinks this house of cards she is trying to build will fall down around her head.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Face on 08/25/13 at 19:44:36

Thank you for your understanding. I appreciate it.

If I ever happen to offend any of you who may be religious, I hope you can look at it from my experience and know that I mean nothing personal by it......

Incedentally, the temple sealing was not Joseph Smith's creation. It's a ritual stolen from the Masons, believe it or not. Even the clothing worn during said ceremony bares masonic symbols to this day. Joseph never had an original idea in his life. (and, No, I don't mean they were divinely inspired) But that's a discussion for another day. If we're not carefull this thread will get moved!

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/26/13 at 00:36:12

515C535E584F0F0A3D0 wrote:

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/26/13 at 03:59:23

2922302C2D3030430 wrote:

I was not aware of the connection with the Mason's on that ceremony. Interesting. A lot of secrecy involved in both the Mason's and Mormonism.

Back on the original subject of online dating.
Apart from a search for a new significant person to share life with, I found that communication with women online to be very interesting. Discussions took all sorts of directions.
It is amazing how freely most people online will speak when they are sitting behind an anonymous persona.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/26/13 at 04:27:04

1C293E3E35282D1F2D3A2D2B294C0 wrote:

[quote author=515C535E584F0F0A3D0 link=1377225596/30#30 date=1377432323] Forget about the "trading up" type, be patient and wait for those looking for a real relationship based on the heart, not the bank account. If you have a good heart then that will attract someone else with the same.
If you really do want another relationship, a GOOD one, then pray about it. Prayer changes things.

I think I have a good heart Lancer ... I ain't perfect, but I always try and do the right thing ... as for the prayer thing, I'm not a religious person, but I do believe in a higher power ... I'd like to believe that prayer changes things, but am not sure ... maybe I should try it ... I've nothing to loose ... thanks for the advice.

BTW, loneliness is THE hardest thing I've ever had to deal with in my life ... I know, compared to some things that others have to deal with in their lives it might not seem all that imortant, but loneliness has taken a toll on me these 3 1/2 years ... the one thing I want most in this world, to share the special moments of life with someone special, seems to be the hardest thing of all to get ....

[/quote]

Yep, loneliness can be a hard thing. That was a big part of what drove me to check out the online match sites. I would encourage it if you have not been there already. There are a lot of sites and the "personalities" of each is as different as the people who go there. Some are good, some are boring, some are just lacking and some are crazy raunchy. There is something for everyone, no matter what you are looking for.
Anyway, as I mentioned to Face, finding one that matches your personality can result in some very interesting and fun conversations, and you never know what may come of it. I ended up finding someone and I am very thankful for it.
It won't hurt to try to see if you like it if you've not done so already. Everything stays anonymous until/if you decide you may want to meet face to face.

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Trippah on 08/26/13 at 19:51:00

If you guys haven't read it yet, try the book "Gone Girl, A Novel by Gillian Flynn. I found it on my kindle and after reading it I wonder who bought it; and am nervous..and it might bring a new perspective to your relationships that have changed. ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/27/13 at 03:13:58

As already mentioned, I've tried the online dating thing without much success ... and contrary to popular opinion, had even less success on the pay-for websites than the free ones ...

In addition to the whole "trading up" approach that many 40-something single gals seem to be subscribing to, when it comes to online dating, women (particularly the more physically attractive gals) have the advantage of being approached by many, many men and thus can afford to be picky ... gals rarely initiate first contact, because they don't have too ... I've sent out literally dozens of first contact messages and have rarely gotten an acknowledgement, let alone a response. The gals who've contacted me 1st (and they've been few and far between let me tell you) have, unfortunately been for the most part, elderly more "matronly" types. No offense to them, but I am not interested in dating my "mother" and believe that a certain amount of mutual attraction is essential to the establishment of a romantic relationship ... which I am still young enough (and young enough at heart) to desire ... I can get a pet dog for companionship, if that's all I were looking for ...

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by WD on 08/27/13 at 06:40:19

Just keep trying Perry, there are two fossils that hang out at the local gun shop, have to be pushing the century mark. Both of their fathers were Confederate veterans who were in THEIR 80s when they married early 20s girls and fathered children...

You could always move down here. Got to be more choices than in eastern Canuckistan...

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by babyhog on 08/27/13 at 07:06:57

No offense intended, Perry, and I trust that you will understand me (cause I luv ya man)... but you must have had horrible profiles!! I mean that in the nicest way, because just from being on this site for years, I know you are an honest, hard-working, good-looking, articulate, sweetheart of a man! I would have to guess that your profiles didn't do you justice, or somehow attracted a different kind of woman that you were hoping for.

I'm leaning with WD.... maybe its all about location and availability in your area..... stuff for Face to keep in mind, if he goes with this option....

(Ewww... I can't imagine 80 year-old balls with a 20-something gal.... thanks for that image WD... Ick!)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/27/13 at 07:33:07

Thanks for the compliments babyhog ... I do appreciate it ... PM me an email address and I'll send ya the link for my online Profile ... I'll let you be the judge and I'd sure appreciate a bit of constructive criticism from an impartial female!

Edit: Dooh!!! I can just PM you the link sure ... would you mind giving me your honest opinion? Thanks :)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by justin_o_guy2 on 08/27/13 at 07:34:54

Hey,Piglet,, why dont you write Perrys profile? YOu know,he may just be humble enough to not be able to tell the girls how wonderful he is.,.
Of course, the jerks can write a great profile for themselves,,
No Pain meant for our friends here

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by babyhog on 08/27/13 at 07:54:08

427760606B7673417364737577120 wrote:

Yep! Hopefully this afternoon....

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/27/13 at 08:27:45

5043070 wrote:

Just keep trying Perry ... You could always move down here. Got to be more choices than in eastern Canuckistan...

There's an idea WD my friend ... have always thought southern U.S. gals to be sweet!

Fact is, here in eastern Canuckistan, I've heard women out number men ... not sure how accurate this is though ... OK, time for a Google search ...

http://globalnews.ca/news/288881/single-in-the-city-what-the-census-can-tell-you-about-your-dating-pool/

from the above link;

Quote:

There are ten available women for every nine available men in both St. John’s, Newfoundland and Saint John, New Brunswick.

Interesting ...

and babyhog ... Thank you! Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by verslagen1 on 08/27/13 at 08:50:28

5A6F7878736E6B596B7C6B6D6F0A0 wrote:

There's an idea WD my friend ... have always thought southern U.S. gals to be sweet!

To a newfy... that's everyone south of the border... right? ;D

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/27/13 at 09:14:43

Almost but not quite verslagen ... latitude of St. John's is actually more southern than most all the other major cities in Canada ;)

Actually, I wuz referring to the classic "southern belles" that WD was referring to!

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by Snubby241 on 08/27/13 at 15:41:38

7A4F5858534E4B794B5C4B4D4F2A0 wrote:

My wife will have passed four years ago come this January. I've been doing the online thing for a hair over 2 years. Honestly, I think I started too early.

You do meet lots of interesting people and I agree with the "trade-up" attitude of a lot of the "attractive" ladies.

Lots are looking for a "nice guy" but he needs to be tall, fit, six pack abs don't hurt, and the funds for world travel. Ladies, those guys in my age group are looking at the 30 year olds, they want a trophy.

I also get a lot of messages from nice matronly ladies who remind me of my Grandma and are just looking for a friend. It's very frustrating.

If you just want to do some hokey pokey, there's always Craigs List, looking for something serious is a pain.

I did get matched with a dominatrix once, if I had been 20, instead of 60 I might have explored that. ;)

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by LANCER on 08/27/13 at 16:43:45

063B2037372C676164550 wrote:

[quote author=7A4F5858534E4B794B5C4B4D4F2A0 link=1377225596/30#38 date=1377598438]As already mentioned, I've tried the online dating thing without much success ... and contrary to popular opinion, had even less success on the pay-for websites than the free ones ...

In addition to the whole "trading up" approach that many 40-something single gals seem to be subscribing to, when it comes to online dating, women (particularly the more physically attractive gals) have the advantage of being approached by many, many men and thus can afford to be picky ... gals rarely initiate first contact, because they don't have too ... I've sent out literally dozens of first contact messages and have rarely gotten an acknowledgement, let alone a response. The gals who've contacted me 1st (and they've been few and far between let me tell you) have, unfortunately been for the most part, elderly more "matronly" types. No offense to them, but I am not interested in dating my "mother" and believe that a certain amount of mutual attraction is essential to the establishment of a romantic relationship ... which I am still young enough (and young enough at heart) to desire ... I can get a pet dog for companionship, if that's all I were looking for ...

Title: Re: Online Dating....You gotta be kidding me.
Post by PerrydaSavage on 08/28/13 at 07:03:33

04392235352E656366570 wrote:

looking for something serious is a pain.

Totally agree ... but I've been on my own for over 3 1/2 years, with only a brief 2 1/2 month relationship in all that time ... I was never much of a ""dater" even back in my young-man, single days ... either I had a steady girl or I didn't ... after which came 23 years of marriage with the woman with whom I thought I'd grow old. Am ready again now, before too much more of my life slips away, to become involved with someone to share friendship, companionship ... and yes the spark of romanticl attraction ... I'm still young enough to want to feel that at least one more time before (my advancing) age catches up to me and renders those feelings null and void ;)