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General Category >> Politics, Religion (Tall Table) >> Old Age Texting, Just a Little fun
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Message started by Midnightrider on 07/08/13 at 10:39:15

Title: Old Age Texting, Just a Little fun
Post by Midnightrider on 07/08/13 at 10:39:15

A middle-aged couple had finally learned how to send

and receive texts on their cell phones. The wife, being

a romantic at heart, decided one day that she'd send her

husband a text while she was out of the house having

coffee with a friend. She texted:

If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I love you.

The husband, being a no-nonsense sort of guy, texted back:

I'm on the toilet. Please advise.

Title: Re: Old Age Texting, Just a Little fun
Post by Midnightrider on 07/08/13 at 11:17:56

What's in the box?

A little old lady went to the grocery store to buy cat food.

She picked up four cans and took them to the checkout counter.

The girl at the cash register said, "I'm sorry, but we cannot sell
you cat food without proof that you have a cat.
A lot of old people buy cat food to eat, and the management
wants proof that you are buying the cat food for your cat."

The little old lady went home, picked up her cat and brought it
back to the store.

They sold her the cat food.

The next day, she tried to buy two cans of dog food.

Again the cashier said "I'm sorry, but we cannot sell you dog food without proof that you have a dog.

A lot of old people buy dog food to eat, but the management wants proof that you are buying the dog food for your dog."

So she went home and brought in her dog.
She then was able to buy the dog food.

The next day she brought in a box with a hole in the lid.
The little old lady asked the cashier to stick her finger in the hole.

The cashier said, "No, you might have a snake in there."

The little old lady assured her that there was nothing in the box that would harm her.

So the cashier put her finger into the box and quickly pulled it out.
She said to the little old lady, "That smells like sh!t."

The little old lady said, "It is.
I want to buy three rolls of toilet paper."

Don't mess with old people.