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Message started by Wolfman on 06/21/11 at 15:50:47

Title: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 06/21/11 at 15:50:47

Ahh the wonder of whats around the next corner....lol

Comeing home last night from the daughters i was ripping along listening to my toons and cutting some corners.
Top a small hill that leads into a downhill lefthand curve. See something dark in the middle of my lane about halfway through the curve as i lay into it. Looks like a big blob of tar at first but then as im almost on top of it it turns into a d@mn dillio headon.
No place to go but push left a lil harder put a lil more lean into the body and roll on the throttle to tighten up the turn and miss the lil bugger.

If id of just dropped my foot off the peg id of kicked him right between the eyes. Missed with the bike by about 18 inchs.
I hate them d@mn things!
Afterward i thought about what might of happened.
The lil bassturds like to jump when their scared, straight up 2 feet.
Good grill height on a car. More like across the top of the front fender into the headlight and over the top into the riders head/chest on a bike.

Bad enough haveing to watch for deer 24/7 around here but dead, dieing and live dillos in the road are a REAL pain in the arse!

Whats been your latest speedbump...lol

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Serowbot on 06/21/11 at 16:20:18

.. but how do they taste?... :-?...

http://images.wikia.com/muppet/images/b/b6/Character.armadillo.jpg

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by WD on 06/21/11 at 16:33:00

They taste like skunks, raccoons and nutria. Like English style roast beef (dry sawdust). Or New England style hamburgers (charcoal). Depends on how you cook them. They smell worse than they taste (kinda like MREs or C-rations).

Local church men's club would send leftovers from their wild game banquets to the sod farm I worked at down here 10-12 years ago.

Had to play dodge 'em with a box turtle this morning. Must be breeding season, they are everywhere down here.

And there is a dead dillo in the lower garden area, even the buzzards won't eat it (but the beagle will, go figure).

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 06/21/11 at 17:03:18

Dillos have a fine grained white meat like a good pork cut.
You can eat em but make d@mn sure their fully cooked.
They carry leprosy which you cant get by handleing them(supposedly), but you CAN get it from eatting their undercooked meats.
Last instances of leprosy was during the depression when folks were cooking them but didnt get em fully cooked. Thats also where possum on the half shell came from...lol

D@mn things are so stinking nasty a vulture wont eat em hardly. Dogs eat em they can get botchelism from them. Lost one last year like that and made another almost dead sick.
Kill em all!

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by KristenAnn on 06/21/11 at 17:06:34

Hey dont pick on my hamburgs. Just caue you may have had a few bad ones doesnt make them all bad. My burgers a nice thick and juicy. If you are ever up this way Ill make you a few with some really good macaroni salad.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by kimchris1 on 06/21/11 at 17:46:46

KristenAnn if I am ever lucky enuf to get to your
neck of the woods, I will pass on your kind of
burgers. I prefer beef or chicken.

So far, knocking on wood. I have been lucky and
not ran over anything. Came close couple weeks
ago. I am not even sure how I missed the lil Chipmunk.
It had to have ran in between the frame and the tire.
I mean he shot out so quick. I was sure I hit him.
Yet looking in the mirror he made it across the other
side. Their was no bump as their would have been had
I ran over him.
I was happy to see that it had survived. :) kim

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by KristenAnn on 06/21/11 at 18:39:32

oh we call beef burgers hamburgers out here in the east. We also have grinders while you may have subs, hero hogie ect. different words same food.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Silly Ogre on 06/21/11 at 18:57:05

DO Dillos serve any beneficial purpose? LOL I am glad that I only have to worry about deer and dogs... I had the opportunity to work an accident of a guy who hit a deer on a Softtail...The deer ran out in front of him he hit it with the fender it flew up on his arms...He had the sense to just drop one arm and throw it off without losing control...The only damage was a bent shift lever and dinged fender...

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by justin_o_guy2 on 06/21/11 at 21:38:04

4D446869696275070 wrote:

DO Dillos serve any beneficial purpose?

I have an older friend who is a master gardener & knower of many things. He taught me o not kill red wasps, because they kill garden bugs, lik tomato worms. He respects all life, everything has some good purpose, except Dillos.. he said Kill them sorry thangs, theyre No Good fer Nuthin, politicians of the animal kingdom.. & they carry leprosy., dont mess with them.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by SuperSavage on 06/21/11 at 21:49:16

Where I live, the deer pop. has exploded. I almost hit a turkey last week. I have never seen a turkey here in my life. Since the banning of DDT many moons ago, the explosion of bird life is incredible.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by WD on 06/22/11 at 03:10:53

You can still get DDT, every old farm in the USA is likely to have a few cans of livestock dust floating around.

Wish I could find a few barrels of chlordane, another banned insecticide. It worked too well, politicians couldn't get their agri-chemical kickbacks.

KristenAnn, beef cooked beyond rare is a crime. Too bad commercial beef is loaded with toxins and bacteria that almost necessitate over-cooking. And anywhere I've eaten in New England has overcooked EVERYTHING. That's hundreds if not thousands of homes, cafes, sandwich shops, etc. Must be the British influence. Lobster, crab and scallops the texture of pencil erasers... Charcoal like meats... Soggy everything else... Yep, sounds like English food to me.

Wait until you get wild hogs SuperSavage. Bike vibration attracts them (and water mocassins) and they want to attack.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by babyhog on 06/22/11 at 05:30:38

A speedbump inverted -- friggin potholes! I do give some credit to the guys though, they are trying to patch them, but man this winter was hard on our roads!

Deer are the most likely thing for me to see jump out on the road. Of course, dogs, cats, snakes, possum, 'coons, are all fairly common too. Can think of 3 nearby areas with fields next to the road that have some "resident" groundhogs. See them there regularly. One was sitting about 2 feet beyond the white line on the side of the road the other day, but I don't see them road-killed very much.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 06/22/11 at 14:20:38

Whistle pigs got a lil more smarts then them stupid dillos.
Whistle pigs will run from a car.
Dillos have such bad eyesight and are so d@mn stupid they stand there in the middle of the road untill a car is right on them then they 'jump'(defensive mechanism) about 2 feet straight up.
This puts them about grill height on a car, bumper height on a truck and right into your sloped forks n headlight on a bike.
They dont squish down real well when you roll over em either like a coon or possum will. Mini ramps for air launchs.

Only real saveings grace is the lil bassturds run at night mostly.
Mostly......
Oh, dont kick one of the lil buggers as you ride by. Its like kicking a rock...lol

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by drharveys on 06/22/11 at 19:45:44

Yup, we've got armadillos here in Missouri, too. I've read announcements that they can't survive the winters this far north, they'll never be able to cross the Missouri River, and so on. The only problem is, dillos can't read, so they just keep heading northwards!

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 06/22/11 at 23:54:54

The last winter or two has done a number on them. Just not enough of a number.
Supposedly anything north of about I-70 is to far for them.
Ive been seeing them along 44 and up along 54 for many years.
Stinking things are so thick around here now noone pays any attention to ones along the road.

As for crossing the MO river dillos can swim and if the rivers too wide or fast they can and will walk along the bottom holding their breath.
Only good thing abou them is they make good target practice. But then you got to haul the stinking things waayyy off.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by 12Bravo on 06/23/11 at 06:20:46

724A494348444B250 wrote:

Supposedly anything north of about I-70 is to far for them.

I wish someone would tell the dillos that. I have seen a few up around here. I have had more close calls with turkey vultures lately than with other critters. I had a rabbit run into me couple of weeks ago, darn rabbit hit my foot and jarred my leg/hip.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by VAFarmer on 06/23/11 at 07:26:29

Round here, you just adjust your riding accordingly like most every place else.

Whenever I feel like I really wanna open it up, I just look back on the pillion and there sits ole mister Murphy, and his book of Law.

Seriously though, the deer are a constant. Turkeys are a constant this time of year, but not so much in the fall.
What has really been causing the problem lately is the black bear population. They have been very active, and are on the roads alot more. One of my wife's co-workers just hit one in a car.

I know folks will scoff at this, but I have been seeing more and more (relative to previous sightings) big cats. I don't know what you wanna call'em, cougars...puma...mountian lion......whatever. Big and long and look like a whole heap 'o trouble. Just catch glimpses of them, but report to the local game wardens and they just laugh at ya and say "there aint none of those around here"......makes me wonder how much wildlife work is actually done in the wild versus sleeping at an overlook in the Tahoe. ;)

God bless,

Farmer

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 06/23/11 at 15:34:05

Yeah 12B, supposedly even SW MO is to cold for them. See the lil bassturds running around in possum fur coats. ::)
Didnt used to hardly see a one except the odd one on the road or south of I44. Now their so common place most folks pay no attention to them.

Dillos im leary of but skunks i Fear! Dont want to hit one of them lil black n white stink bombs on the bike. It would make you CRY! :'(

VA, they know their there but they wont admit to it. IF they admit to those types of cats being in the area they become responsible for any stock damage ect.
If its a Non Native invasive species(like dillos) or a Cat 'just wondering through' their not responsible. They wont admit to them untill they absolutely have to. All game agencies are that way.
That and denying their exsistance means fewer folks will be out looking for and possibly even trying to shoot them.
Have played that game for many many years with the MDC over cougars and black bears here in MO.

They admit to cougars now(couldnt deny em any longer, to many sightings and proof). And of course our non exsistant bears went from zero esistance to at least 300 and possibly 900 resident bears overnight(literaly).
You get a couple seen inside lebanon MO and a couple hit on the highway it gets hard to deny them...lol
Dont think i want to hit either one, might pi$$ em off! :o

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by WD on 06/23/11 at 18:56:10

Our neighborhood in Washington had resident bears, bobcats, cougars, deer, elk, bald and golden (supposedly not found west of the Cascade Range) eagles, resident owls. And the ballsiest chipmunks you ever saw, they were always on the patio making funny faces at the cats (until I put in a cat flap). Of course, I did live IN the mountains.

Game department denied wolves and grizzlies for years, until too many were shot by people who don't know the difference between them and coyotes or black bears. Same idiots who shot an elk calf during deer season, in the neighborhood.

We used to have a flock of wild turkeys and a small group of wild hogs locally. Now extinct on my place, lots of "Mountain Williams" (hillbillies) in the area. And moonshiners...

I hit a dillo in Savannah MS years ago with an F600 garbage truck. Dillo got stuck between the dual tires... not sure what smelled worse.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by drharveys on 06/23/11 at 21:21:24

I saw a cougar once while camping in Anza-Borrego State Park in California. It was on a hillside some distance away and it just slunk from one bit of brushy cover to another. Just a couple of seconds, but those guys will definitely focus your attention! I was hopping out of my tent with my hunting knife in my hand at the sound of every kangaroo rat that night!

Also, it was the only backpacking trip I ever accepted a ride out from. There was obvious rain clouds off in the distance, so flash floods were a real possibility.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by VAFarmer on 06/24/11 at 08:13:28

I was hopping out of my tent with my hunting knife in my hand at the sound of every kangaroo rat that night!

Lemmie tell ya what---first off, I do not promote breaking the law....but some law is oppressive.

Secondly, I understand you WERE in the People's Republic of Kalifornia...

BUT.......I would be packing more than a good knife ;)

A good knife can be a man's best friend, but no substitute for a well concealed, outta sight-outta mind pistola.
Hot lead has been deterring wild animals and would be criminals for many a year now.

God bless ya,

Farmer

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by joscswny on 06/24/11 at 09:36:19

Quote:

Good girl Kristen Ann! Sorry to be so late to your support. Don' be takin' no trash talk from them what put red stuff in chowder.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by WD on 06/25/11 at 10:25:35

Red chowder? That NYC garbage? Bleah...

Food around here isn't very good anymore either. Too much salt, too much soybean oil, too much MSG.

Seattle area food blows chunks too. Overcooked, underseasoned, toxic seafoods (smelt is bait, not food; fish in Puget Sound are full of copper, lead and arsenic, fun to catch but do not eat them). And if the coffee is really as burnt as it smells (Starbucks aka SorryF**ks, Seattle's Best (they mean worst) so you need to fill it with syrups and soy milk, don't drink it. Citiots... (city idiots).

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by JohnBoy on 06/25/11 at 13:38:51

In the 60's and 70's we had several people hit alligators along the Tamiami Trail between Miami and Naples FL. The trail was about 150 miles of desolate, high speed road that was about three feet above the canal on either side.
Imagine striking a black speed bump crossing a black road, at three in the morning with six feet of water on either side of the road bed. If the gator crawled off and the driver was killed the cops would chalk it up to speed, drinking, drugs, or all of the above. I am sure that there are still some people out there that were never accounted for.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by joscswny on 07/02/11 at 14:29:58

What do you suppose the gators think of people? Bland? Not enough lean red meat?

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by 2whlthrpy on 07/03/11 at 19:11:19

Last week I had a blue recycle bin fall out of the top of a large truck passing me going the other direction. Fell right in front of me and bounced. I veered a bit left and it hit me in the right foot and some of the peg. I was going about 35 mph and straight so I was able to keep the bike upright. Scared the piss out of me though. Happened so fast but I guess they always do.

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by skatnbnc on 07/03/11 at 19:35:53

You know how when you read a post, the ads above it scroll and catch key words to match adverts to what you are reading about.

Well I had a really good laugh at the latest one whilst reading this post - "Now selling Armadillo Repellent - GUARNTEED to work instantly"

;D just what we need when out riding in dillo country! ;D :D ;D

Title: Re: Speedbumps?
Post by Wolfman on 07/03/11 at 21:02:26

Went to run a quick trip to town. As i was runing out the gravel road had a lil ole black snake about 3 feet long layed out in the road in front of me. Think i missed all of him except the tip of his tail. His buddies probably call him stubby now...lol